NIAM

Second Chance - Chapter 2

MIXED FEELINGS

LOUIS....

          Harry, Liam and I planned to go out as it was our day off. Our next show would be in two days, so we had a bit of down time. We decided to go shopping for gifts for our friends and family back home. I loved buying things for those that I loved. I was thinking of buying a bit of jewellery for my mum, clothes and stuff toys for my sisters, and for my friends, souvenirs and other stuffs that would catch my eyes.

We asked Niall and Zayn to come with us but Niall refused to get up. I guess he was still feeling tired so we let him sleep. As for Zayn, he had been acting strange since Sunday. He received a text message after we did sound check in the afternoon. After he read it and he promptly walked away to make a phone call. When he came back, he was all smiles and looked pretty excited.

When I ask him about it, he said it was from an old friend. That got me remembering an old friend of his, a girl who used to come and support us during our X-Factor days. No! I stopped myself. I refused to think about her. She was in the past. A distant past. Very distant past. I had a wonderful life now. I was happy. 

We were about to go out, and Liam was opening the door. Suddenly, he stopped. Harry was in front of me and I was the last one to see what caused Liam to stop in his track. Over Harry’s shoulder, I could see Zayn hugging a girl outside the room which he shared with me.

There was nothing wrong with hugging a girl, especially when she had a body like that. Man! That body was worth hugging. However, when you were one fifth member of a famous boy band hugging a girl who was not your girlfriend, in front of your hotel room, half-naked, it could be misconstrued even though everything was completely innocent, which I knew it was because Zayn was in the next bed alone last night.

If someone were to see this scene, it would be interpreted as Zayn cheating on his girlfriend. It looks like he was reluctant to say goodbye to the girl after spending the night with her. He was barefooted and he did not even have his short on. He was holding her tightly in his arms. It was as if he never wanted to let her go.

If the paparazzi could see this, the press would have a field day!

Daddy Liam cleared his throat. “Zayn?” A request for explanation on why he wasn’t more discreet. Scene like this should be kept behind closed doors because it could be blown out of proportion in no time at all.

Zayn looked up and let her go but he still had his arm around her shoulder. I was smirking, enjoying the moment when Zayn tried to explain himself. I looked at the girl. She was staring at me. Somehow she looked really familiar. She reminded me of someone. No, it couldn’t be. It couldn’t possibly be her. I probably conjured up her image by thinking about her earlier.

My attention turned to Zayn when he says, “It’s not what it looks like, lads. This was Holly. Remember her? She used to come to watch us on X-Factor.”

Hearing that name was like someone had just punched me in the stomach. I tensed up and my eyes snapped back to her face. It was HER! After all these years, she was here again. She looked different yet she looked the same. I couldn’t explain it. She looked exquisite. Her shiny brown hair was longer, the sexy lips I used to kiss so passionately was so... so... inviting, her face, her eyes, everything about her brought back painful memories, when the two of us were ecstatically happy, which I tried so hard to forget.

I didn’t know how to feel. Angry? Yes, I was angry for her leaving without explanation and without even saying goodbye. Frustrated? Heck, yes.  I wanted to kiss those luscious lips until she forgot every other boy around her. Happy? Maybe. I finally laid eyes on the face that haunted me for more than two years. Hate? I guess. I hated her for breaking my heart, for leaving without a single word, without any explanation why she had to go. Afraid? Yes. Definitely yes, when I realised that I still had feelings for her. I was afraid that I was going to fall in love with her again. In a way, I still had not got over her yet. No matter how many times I told myself that she no longer mattered to me, that I no longer cared about her, I knew that was a lie.

Did I fall for her last time? Yes, I did. Head over heels! No one knew what happened between us. It was our secret. Not even Zayn knew, although at times I had the feeling he had an inkling of what was going on. Zayn was very protective of her. It was better that way; I didn’t want anyone to know how she stole and then broke my heart, and how I wept silently for her.

After she left, I felt like curling up in a corner and shutting everybody out. However, I knew that my band mates would be asking questions; questions which I couldn’t answer. To avoid that, I threw myself into work to keep myself from thinking about her, to keep from crying my eyes out. I worked so hard that every night, the instant my head touched the pillow, I fell asleep.

“Holly? Yeah, yeah, I remember her.” Harry said enthusiastically. He stepped forward to give her a hug and a peck on the cheek. “Wow, you look stunning.”

“Thank you, Harry. Still quite the charmer, I see. You didn’t look too bad yourself.” She smiled when he let go of her. She turned to Liam, hugged and kissed him on the cheek. “Hi, Liam.”

“Hi, Holly. It has been quite some time, hasn’t it?” Liam said.

“Yes, it has. I really missed you guys.” When Liam let go of her, she turned to me. I didn’t even move a muscle.

“Hi, Louis.” She said warily. She bit her lips, looking so unsure of herself and about how I would react. Her beautiful light brown eyes bore into mine. I lost track of time standing there unmoving while staring at her with a dark frown on my face. After some time, Liam nudged me in the rib.

“Hi.” I said tonelessly. Somehow I managed to get the greeting out. She gave me a timid little smile which I chose to ignore.

She was even more beautiful now. Her hair was different; longer now and she had different hairstyle. Her hair used to be shorter and she likes to pull it back in a ponytail. How many times had I run my fingers through that soft hair while kissing her? Now she let it falls at her back, while some of it falls in front. The end which curls slightly rests on her firm br... let’s not go there. I was in the middle of a hotel corridor with three of my mates, which makes it super unacceptable to have thoughts about her, er... physical attributes.

“Don’t I get a hug?” She asked. Four pairs of eyes were on me. It unnerved me. If I didn’t hug her, my friends would question me for acting strange around her. So, I stepped forward and hugged her dutifully. I was tense and the embrace was awkward but the moment I touched her, electricity ran up my arm. I could feel her trembled slightly. It shocked me when I realised that what I really want to do was kiss her, right there and then!

I released her quickly. I wanted to get out of here. I didn’t want to be standing near her because she was such a temptation. Avoiding looking at her, I nudged Harry’s arm.

“Shouldn’t we be going?” I said quite abruptly. Harry only responded by raising his eyebrows in question. He must think I was acting a little odd, which I was.

Liam saved the day by saying, “Well, you two catch up on the news first, while we do our shopping. Shall we have lunch together, Holly? Are you free all day today?”

She flashed him her brilliant smile. “Yes, I am and that would be wonderful, Liam. Thank you.”

“So, we’ll see you later then.” Both Harry and Liam gave her another hug and kissed her cheek. I just stood there, still avoiding looking at her, but very aware of her every movement.

I left hurriedly, trying to put the much needed distance between us. Trying to control myself, I took a deep breath which was a mistake. I could smell her perfume. I recognised the scent. Her favourite perfume: Flower by Kenzo. Soft, fresh, floral and sweet.

I wanted to kiss her. I wanted to hug her and take her to bed but I also want to strangle her.  Well, not literally, anyway. Maybe, what I was feeling right now was just because of the shock of seeing her after all this while. I knew I shouldn’t be feeling this way about her. I couldn’t feel like this. What I should be feeling was indifference. Yes, that’s right! Indifference! I shouldn’t be having these feelings; I had a girlfriend, for heaven’s sake!

Second Chance - Chapter 1

BUTTERFLIES IN STOMACH

HOLLY...

As the plane touched down in JFK International, New York, I started to feel really nervous. I’m not quite sure why. Was it because I was meeting one of the closest people in my life (not that I had many), after almost three years or was it because I was finally going to meet HIM again? I couldn’t decide.

I had my own reasons to be here: To promote my new book and to make sure the boy (well, man now) that used to be my best friend and confidant, was okay. Zayn and I used to be very close. I practically lived in his house, as much time as I spent there with him and his family. I loved his family. The whole bunch of them: His parents, his sisters and assorted uncles, aunts and cousins. They were close knit and very protective of each other.

When I was there, I could forget for a while own my family and problems at home, and pretended his family was mine. He was the brother that I never had. Sadly, I hadn’t seen or contacted him since I left England. Not that I didn’t want to, I just couldn’t. I couldn’t because I had a secret to keep.

After collecting my bag, I decided to go to my hotel first to freshen up. After an 8-hour flight, I must look a sight. Besides, it’s only 8 in the morning. It was an off day for the band and the Zayn I knew would never be up this early on an off day.

So, I took my time and showered and changed my clothes. Now, I had a problem! Should I go casual, smart casual or sexy? I did not want to give off the vibe that I was trying to impress someone. By someone I meant him, ‘the one I was dreading to meet’.

I met him when he and Zayn were still competing in the X-Factor. I was kind of on the rebound at that time. I just broke up with Jason, my two-timing boyfriend, while he was having problems with his girlfriend; long distance relationship and such.

I stared at my bag full of clothing articles and I was screaming in my head “I don’t have anything to wear!” After much internal debate with myself, I settled on what I call my Oreo-inspired outfit: chocolate with white dots, spaghetti-string mini baby-doll with brown ribbon, and white pants and brown belt. I put on my amber necklace and earrings. I let my long brown hair hang down my back. Then, I finished off the look with brown stiletto and white handbag. Hmm...Not bad for someone who didn’t have anything to wear!

The 20-minutes ride to the hotel where Zayn and his band mates were staying was uneventful. I looked out of the window but I did not notice anything or any activities that were going on outside the taxi because my mind was busy replaying what had happened two days ago.

I had just come back to England after almost three years and I went straight to Zayn’s house. I couldn’t wait to see him. I missed him so much. The last conversation we had was the day before I left. I wanted to say goodbye to him because I don’t know when I would see him again. I couldn’t go before I see him. He will always be my best friend and brother in my heart.

I scrolled down my phone until I found Zayn’s number, which was given to me by his mum. I wanted to call him but decided against it. I texted him instead.

Hi Sunshine, it’s Holly. I dropped by your house yesterday but your mum said you were still on tour in America. She gave me your phone number. Heard you’re going to New York next. I’ll be in New York on Tuesday. Maybe we could meet up sometime?

Three minutes later, my phone rang. It was Zayn calling. I picked it up.

“Holly?” Hearing his husky voice brought such joy to my heart.

“Hi, Sunshine” I greeted him with a smile in my voice, using the term of endearment I had for him.

“Holly? Princess?” He was still in shock. “Is this really you?”

“Yes, it’s me.”

“Gosh, Holly! Where have you been?” He sounded happy and angry at the same time. “I have been trying to find out where you are. Where are you? What time is your fight arriving in New York? Whe...”

“Zayn, slow down.” I said. “I’m in London right now. Listen, I am actually in the middle of something right now. We’ll talk when I get to New York, okay?” We talked for about five minutes and after exchanging information needed, I said good bye to Zayn with a promise to meet up.

A loud horn blaring jolted me back to the present time. When we arrived at the hotel, the taxi stopped right at the entrance. After paying the driver, I stepped out of the taxi.  I took a deep calming breath and walked nervously into the building. I could feel my heart beating erratically. My palms started sweating. I was happy, excited, nervous and a whole loads of other conflicting emotions at the same time.

I hoped he was not rooming with Zayn. I hoped he had his own room. I hoped I will not have to see him. I hoped he had not even woken up yet. I hoped he would sleep until I left. Jeez, I was a total mess. Nobody knew what had happened between us and I prefer it stayed that way.

I got to Zayn’s room without remembering how I got there. I was functioning fully on automatic. I knocked on the door hesitantly and it was opened immediately. Zayn must have run to the door when he heard me knocking. He had no shoes or even shirt on. The first thing I noticed about him was his height. He had gotten taller. Then, I noticed his collection of tattoos and his facial hair, which I might say, looked really sexy on him.

I hadn’t even managed to say ‘Hi’ when Zayn enveloped me in a bear hug. When I got over my surprise, I hugged him back tightly, burying my face in his shoulder. I really missed my best friend.

“Holly! I can’t believe it’s you. I missed you, Princess.” He whispered emotionally in my ears.

“I missed you too, Sunshine.” My voice was muffled with my face being pressed into his shoulder. My eyes began to fill with tears. “I missed you so much.”

I was not quite sure how long we stood there in each other’s arms, without saying anything, just savouring the moment. I miss the musky scent that was him, his heart-melting smile, his stunning brown eyes, everything. We were brought back to the present when somebody cleared his throat. I had my back to the person, so I didn’t know who it was.

“Zayn?” It wasn’t exactly a question. It sounded like a question but what it was, was a demand for explanation.

Zayn looked up and let go of me. I turned around slowly. A bit to my right, in front of an open door, stood three gorgeous male species of human being... and HE was one of them! I couldn’t help but stare.

Louis Tomlinson was even more devastating to my senses now. I knew how he looked like, of course. How could I not, his face was plastered all over the media but standing there, face to face, was nerve-wrecking. He looked so delicious... I mean, he had grown into a mighty fine looking lad.

I stood there like an idiot staring at him. The sight of him caused me to have a slight breathing difficulty. I actually forgot to breathe for a while there. His magnificent blue eyes were filled with amusement. He was smiling widely which caused crinkles at the corner of his eyes. His brown hair, which I used to run my fingers through, was covered by a grey beanie. He was smirking at Zayn, silently laughing at his friend’s predicament. He had not realised yet who the girl with Zayn was.

Zayn still had his arm around my shoulder. He kissed my temple with affection. “It’s not what it looks like, lads. This is Holly. Remember her? She used to come to watch us on X-Factor.”

I hold my breath waiting for Louis’s reaction.

Second Chance